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    Parent DirectoryOsama letter to his cavemates...


    I found this in the archives of some CIA intelligence files that Iíve acquired :

      ----- Original Message -----
      From: Bin Laden, Osama
      Sent: Monday, November 19, 2001 8:17 AM
      To: Cavemates
      Subject: The Cave
      
      Hi guys. We've all been putting in long hours but we've really come
      together as a group and I love that. Big thanks to Omar for putting up the
      poster that says "There is no I in team" as well as the one that says "Hang
      In There, Baby." That cat is hilarious. However, while we are fighting a
      jihad, we can't forget to take care of the cave. And frankly I have a few
      concerns.
      
      First of all, while it's good to be concerned about cruise missiles, we
      should be even more concerned about the scorpions in our cave. Hey, you
      don't want to be stung and neither do I, so we need to sweep the cave
      daily. I've posted a sign-up sheet near the main cave opening.
      
      Second, it's not often I make a video address but when I do, I'm trying to
      scare the most powerful country on earth, okay? That means that while we're
      taping, please do not ride your razor scooter in the background. Just while
      we're taping. Thanks.
      
      Third point, and this is a touchy one. As you know, by edict, we're not
      supposed to shave our beards. But I need everyone to just think hygiene,
      especially after mealtime. We're all in this together. 
      
      
      Fourth: food. I bought a box of Cheez-Its recently, clearly wrote "Osama"
      on the front, and put it on the top shelf. Today, my Cheez-Its were gone.
      Consideration. That's all I'm saying.
      
      Finally, we've heard that there may be American soldiers in disguise trying
      to infiltrate our ranks. I want to set up patrols to look for them.
      
      First patrol will be Omar, Muhammed, Abdul, Akbar, and Richard.
      
      Love you lots.
      Osama
      





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